this is me now



I dont often.....

I don't often post 'warm fuzzy' videos---but this one hit me ---- and I wanted to have it somewhere---and to share it----


define the word 'retired'

 when you think of retirement---you think of , or at least I do----or at least I did----you think of downsizing to a condo, travel, going on a mission, being 65.....gray hair, moving a bit get the idea.....this is kind of what I pictured:
yeah----this is my idea of retired

okay--i'm having trouble with pictures and spacing....but i'll push on.... please keep reading
so....david retired yesterday after 27 years working for the state of texas....and started today at his new job as executive director for Computers for the Blind----a small non-profit agency based in Richardson (just north of Dallas).  He goes into the 'office' every 2 weeks for a board of directors meeting...... he will work from home in the office we have set up in a corner of our bedroom.  He also continues with his ExpertsonBlindness consulting/expert witness business---- so he has 2 part-time jobs....both from home.... i'm sure we'll be fine.....really----we'll be great
Day 1.....david comes home from meeting with 2 attorneys....eats some chicken wings....changes clothes.... I made spaghetti for dinner---so I ate spaghetti....apparently we have things to still work talking about what is for dinner and what was NOT....and that its NOT okay to talk the entire time I am watching Dance Moms but I have to be quiet during a rerun of Persons of Interest---yes---even after 33 years we still are working out the kinks.
Day 1 evening.....we go to the half price on Tuesday dollar movie to see RIPD (totally redbox it---its a clever silly movie)----after the movie david tells me that 5 minutes INTO the movie, he realized he had seen it before.....I must have been either on a work trip or doing a show at the local community theater.   does anyone else find that to be hilarious?
AND SCARY!!!!!!!!!!!!
retired----we are not downsizing to a condo---we paid off the house..... we are travelling but have been doing that for years....the mission? our goal is 5 years from now (our first one will be in Nauvoo, Illinois---"sunset on the Mississippi"---a musical revue done outdoors--duh--on the banks of the Mississippi river--every night....gray hairs? I call them white highlights....moving slower? I am having foot surgery in November---then no more slower----and, for the record....WE ARE DECADES (alright---decade) AWAY FROM 65!!!
retired=twice the husband/half the money


I've never seen anything like it in my life

david and i are not hoarders---but pack rats----probably----and we had 6 kids---and all their stuff---and saved clothes from season to season to hand down---and 8 bikes---and scooters----and memorabilia----and a freezer---and david's tools-----and i bought school supplies in bulk---and toilet paper and get the idea.

and we've always had big cars---big cars that don't fit lengthwise in a garage---or heightwise---so it was easy to just toss stuff in the garage---since the cars wouldn't go in there anyway.

and then the kids started leaving---and we cleaned out their bedrooms----but kept their stuff---in the garage----

then we got the convertible.....and that little girl needs to be in a garage.

so every day i would go thru 2 boxes----stuff from weddings 5 years ago--- and trash or donate it.  the only clothes in there now are my winter clothes.  suitcases are upstairs in the attic----we have 20 empty plastic buckets ready for leah to use to put their stuff in storage----we had a shredded ping pong table (we like ping pong table---but i broke the table)---- but I knew there was light at the end of a tunnel----a very long crowded tunnel

then we got into a tiff-----and i went to the theater to see a show----alone

came home----to this-----

for 33 years our garage has been a joke---one year we asked our sons in law to clean it out for our present----but that mostly meant rearrange-----

I cried when I saw this


awwwww-----lovely september-----lets be cool

Meredith----whats with all the bruises?
new bruise each show!
august was spent performing "A Wrinkle in Time"---my first non-musical performance since high school.....I got to play the part of Mrs. Whatsit------which means I got to play me----an animated me that sparkled with glitter and fell off benches and slid down ramps..... I met some amazing people that I got to learn from----as always----I love the process.

august was stinkin hot----but leah and joe came and worked so hard to help our backyard be greener and lusher----and it is----

august was a couple of Dancing Moose Shows

September----david retired.

WHAT THE WHAT THE WHAT THE???????!!!!!!!!!!!!

David was offered a position as executive director for Computers For the Blind----a small non-profit that takes donated computers and refurbishes them and sends them out internationally to visually-impaired people.....he'll do 20 hrs a week working at home----going into the office for board meetings in Dallas every few weeks.  His job is to grow the company and its branding.....get more professionals on the advisory he is done working with the state-----he has worked for the state of texas for 28 years! this whole decision thing happened in about 4 days----altho we had been talking about leaving the state job (not leave texas) for awhile.   Now, David may be old enough to retire----but I all of a sudden become the token wife----cause aint NO way i'm old enough!

twice the husband----half the money

i'm still doing Dancing Moose---and David still has 7 cases he is working on---with 2 trials coming up....

we are cleaning out the garage to put the convertible in there----we 've never been able to put a car in the garage----but it is actually happening!

leah and her family are going to be living with us from dec-june ----joe is done with medical school classes and just needs to wait to find out where they are going for residency-----so knowing that we eat different---and our fridge was not big enough for all of us-----we downgraded (well-----in size)---

the nelson's fridge is perfectly happy in the garage!  well---we really didn't ask her if she was happy----but bet she's happy she is about to be filled with all sorts of yummy goodness!
Meredith is doing okay----lots of change----i'm not sure about all that---but i'm certainly seeing the hand of God in my ability to be calm, in opportunities that are opening and blessings that are being afforded..... probably just jinxed myself huh.+
I want to get back into things that I took myself out of---ward choir----marching band----yeah-----its time.


road trip

 My nephew Michael got married to Amanda Saul in Quincy, Il on July 20, 2013----so what better reason for a road trip for the aunts! Pyper flew in from California, Eden drove up from Austin---and we three piled into our car and drove 12 hours to Quincy.  We sang everything from Eminem to the Mormon Tabernacle Choir to Carrie Underwood to Michael Jackson----had a great time together.  Our first dinner there was Ruby Tuesday----a lot of emotional history for me at Ruby Tuesday---but I pushed thru it and had some amazing chicken noodle soup!
 I tried to take a picture---but you know what i look like!
 Friday was spent shopping at Cato's (sorry David)----then the wedding party had the rehearsal while THE AUNTS decorated for the rehearsal dinner.  Mike and Mandy are both MAJOR musicians---so of course our theme was music----then we all meandered over to Culvers---TRADITION!  (left to right---Austin, 18, Michael 29, Carrie (gf of Luke) and Jake (22)
 left to right---matt---father of the groom---my kid brother---=-his wife shelley---there is carrie again---eden---one of the aunts---my big sister
 more of the table----pyper---baby sister----Pat---married to my brother marc---she is one of THE AUNTS---a nicer person you'll never meet----marc---big brother---fancies himself quite a photographer
 brian---brother of the groom----this is the nephew (with his wife ashley and my other nephew jake) that stayed with us last summer killing bugs.
                                                                    Charlie's angels!
                                                                  me and my mom---the best
                                                        sitting around waiting for the wedding
                                                        these were on the ends of the pews----what a great idea!
                                                            matt escorting mom
                                                                     mike looked so happy
                                                           matt's oldest grandson, Elliot, was the ring bearer---nailed it

                                                                eden and mom
                                                             just so you think its only me---this is marc
                                                           luke(21) and marc dancing together at the wedding----um---yeah

it was a great weekend---we then turned around and drove to Kansas City and dropped Pyper off at the airport and eden and I cruised back to fort worth---and she hopped in her car and drove home to Lago Vista (near Austin).

What a blessing that, having been siblings for 44-63 years---we really enjoy being together---the only ones that werent there (other than spouses) was My oldest brother Ace and his wife Judy---and they were missed---Judy always adds to the conversation with her infectious laugh.

so----to the next grandchild to get married-----we'll gladly do this again!


mid-life crisis----or just too much time spent on Craigslist?

                                got a 1999 Chevy Cavalier Convertible ---- took the boys for a ride--- with our sunglasses of course! they weren't sure of the wind or the HEAT----but it was a cool ride.
 so after we put up the top----milo conked out
                                        apparently these rims are really impressive---who knew?
                                          pink hair chalk at my nephew's wedding----and straightened hair----                                                I may need an intervention


I am happy today for the sunshine

for the skies of gray or blue
for within my heart is the song of love
ill sing i'll love i'll do

I do have a lot to be grateful for

health....well...other than my foot
family...well other than that whole ace being gone thing
family close....well...if you consider 4 hrs away close
wisdom of I get older I see with different eyes...well...maybe I just need new glasses

I have a calling that I love....primary piano player----I get to play with octaves and embellish the written music----
I have a job that I love.... Ethics Musical Comedy
I have family that I love regardless----and loves me regardless----
wisdom of ages-----I really do see things better---broader----softer
I have a husband that is the salt of the world----adds all the flavor in my life.

i'm very grateful.

 and I know I have a choice to be a crayon drawn happy face-----or a scowling bitter old ----albeit very well put together-----old woman.



that last post was a little whiny


scientific proof......what a sad statement about you!

i get so much more attention and comments (thank you Shauntae!) when I have a bad day/month/year and cry on all y'alls shoulders----than when I post darling (albeit way too many in one post) pictures of my darling grands!

so---lest you think that everything is hunky dory----remember this

ace is still gone---*&^(&^*&^$#@%$#@%$

Molly just had her baby----still has blocked us all on fb----but did text me a picture----mixed messages much? I get reports that she is fine.

Oklahoma and Texas have had some bad luck in weather and tragic deaths---but i'm okay (too soon?)

my hair is still uncut

i'm having MAJOR HORRIFIC OPEN GAPING WOUND OFF MY FOOT FOR A WEEK IN A BOOT FOR LIKE 8-12 WEEKS NO WORK surgery the first week of November---- on my foot---my 2nd toe----and my plantar plate----it has a tear----so I can milk this for another 4-6 months.

meanwhile I have to wear this splint---and ugly orthopedic shoes----and use a topical analgesic compound that can cause FATAL RASHES (at least that's what the warning label said---also dizziness, diarrhea or constipation---apparently i'm going to be fine for all that) to kill the pain at night.

never let it be said that merf doesn't give you with stuff to worry about

from my road trip last fall

Mom came to see me do "Fiddler on the Roof" 5---yes 5--- ffelt that i was back in high school with mom seeing me in all my shows.....then she went to Lago Vista to visit eden for a few days---then i got to go and visit for a day before bringing mom back---had tickets to KOOZA ((cirque del sole)) that night courtesy of my lovely husband.she played with my puppies and they played with her.

 took  to Mom to Joe's Crab Shack---where they make
 sure she is ready and prepared for her meal.       Kooza was typical jaw-dropping effects

 Bill took me on a trip home from the restaurant-----loved the blowing hair! it was great.

mom davd and i all went to see Kooza---great show!

bill was also a little appalled at the amount of food i brought home---my husband will be thrilled!



lol----posted this when we got back from driving to florida----not sure how much is humor and how much is true

Dear daughters o'mine'

include yourself if you so feel included...

not come from my womb ---well one up AND THRU

who raised you this way? who taught you to make lunch as family was walking in the door
who raised you to plan every child rushing to me with theirs arms outstretched saying :granma!
who raised to you feed your children healthy food in the car so they would have to go to the bathroom?
who ever raised you sure loved you........she must be so proud
certainly she graduated early to show you how easily it can be done and to keep one focus always-----god only gives us one really cool gift
she certainly feels that if there were no men left around----we would be okay---except for killing bugs....that would be porter.
really----run off to a vegas weekend!??????really??????
shopping----certainly you were raised to know that the male of the population likes color---be it on toes or nails or hair or clothing
who raised you to put together a family home evening program of epic proportions---ah  Grandpa Ace came to you in a dream.

no one starved
no one got left behind
random strangers/family members cleaned random bums===we hope they were part of our group
florida is wonderful....will I ever drive in 2 cars with 6 little ones to get there? gosh---I don't think so.

major catchup from last fall

cannon in his winter coat!

JOnas and his brothers were thrillled to come up and play with the doggies

this is me and Belinda Hardee (fruma Sarah) in our Fiddler get-ups--from 2012----sorry its catchup time
 we spent a few days in Mesa with the Edwards family----drinking their green smoothies----hearing them play their cellos and pianos and violins----applauding their smelling
 megan gave me her bedroom for a couple of days-----almost i snuggled with eeyore a time or two
 this was an amazingOrgan Stop Pizza place that made me happy-----the guy played all songs---all the stops---no music-----thats what i want todo when i retire! sorry that it is sideways

 this should be a picture of blake or macy----but apparently megan sneaked in again!
this doesnt belong here---ashley ensign gave me these the next night in provo
 amy, macy and mom and i went to see the gilbert temple---unfinished----still beautiful
 time for school (madi is already gone)---ben, blake, grandma, megan,. macy and mom
 madison and mom with brownie enjoying the attention from grandma

 theres macy eating at the table!  yay macy!
every night we got a green smoothie---and it was delicious----i think we shall set a knew tradition
mom and i had a great time throughout all this time together---spent a lot of time at airports and renting cars---but it was well worth it!
 my cousin Sue and I have the ability to be gone for a long time and just pick up----she is a treasure
 we took out the byu students to Olive Garden---had a great time with Alex, Jake, Brian and Ashley
                                                                      Brian and Ashley
 mom and jake comparing what should be ordered

sideways picture of mom and the byu grands
we were on our way to Northern California for granddaughter Amber's wedding---hmmmm---mere---where are your pictures of that?