okay---havent perfected the whole Julia/Merf thing yet...

making banana bread this morning...tripled the recipe...thinkin'
" hmmm"...i say to myself...
"self, maybe a handful of chocolate chips tossed in would make it that much yummier!"
i begin filling muffin cups (okay---so its banana muffins...not bread....thats not the point)
i finish with the muffin cups and a drop of the batter gets on my finger....
"hmmm"...i say to myself
"self, probably shouldnt lick that finger....raw eggs and all"
never being one to listen to myself...i totally lick my finger.
AND BEGIN GAGGING! OH MY GOODNESS!
it was salt...not sugar...in that clear tub in my cupboard.
3 STINKIN CUPS OF SALT!
i grab for my ice water ( i always cook with a glass of ice water near me----hmmm....not sure why...have to think about that)

into the trash goes 9 eggs, 9 cups of flour, 10 bananas, 3 cups of salt, 2+ c of butter...sad day...will start over tomorrow.

and may i say---its not the first time i've 'substituted'----later date, i'll tell you about my cornstarch/baking soda gravy disaster!

Dear Merf,

today you switched seasons in your closet.....so here is a NOT-TO-DO list!
1. dont buy any sweaters...nothing...none...you have every color/style/length/pattern...and sometimes two...you have plenty....unless you see a lovely red sweater...or a nice baby blue---but only those.
2. dont buy any stretchy-pants---yes, me and nacho libre---winter is my time for stretchy pants---and i have plenty....unless you see a nice gray pair to go with your new gray boots.
3. dont buy any shoes/boots/slippers/socks that look like slippers...thanks to Oprah and Payless....you have plenty....unless you see a pair of slippers that are really cute in a nice plaid...you can never have too much plaid.
4. dont buy purses---well---not many---you have every style and every color you need...so dont buy any unless you see one on a really good deal in a must-have purple.
5. dont buy anym0re suits---you dont really like to wear suits...you only like to look at people who like to wear suits....so, unless you find one that doesnt look like a suit...dont get one.
6. while we are at it...dont buy any more serving pieces---yes...i looked thru your cupboards...yes, i know you had a bunch of weddings recently...that time is over...get over it....so now you can stop....you have plenty...unless it is a double crock-pot server---then you can totally get that....its a crock pot after all and you can never have too many crock pots.
7. no more freezer food....the guys dont eat it while you are gone....and you dont eat it when you are home because you cook...i know it fulfills a need deep inside....we've come to peace with that...but there is no more room and we are coming up into the holidays....unless you see something new or packaged new...then you can buy one...only one...unless its on sale...then you can get some.
8. no more wedding dresses....you have 4 in your closet! really? who needs 4 wedding dresses....dont live in the past....let it go....now is the time to buy little boy sweatsuits....they take up a lot less space than wedding dresses...really....4 is plenty.
Love,
You

p.s. and while we are at it....no more guest towel sets....yes...i'm heading upstairs and i already know what awaits us there...really...no one gets that many guests....no one.

calm down

I havent gone anywhere....well thats not true...in october and november i've been:

springfield, missouri
el paso
houston (twice)
san antonio (3 times)
austin (twice)
richardson, tx
dallas
little rock, ark
indianapolis, in
norman, ok
oklahoma city, ok

i've performed for more than 1500 people....seen probably 150 + marching band shows....
been a great month.
and now....a break...so i will blog...oh, yes....i will blog.....i have opinions....things have happened and you'll want to hear about them all! i've been taking pictures anticipating me blogging....
i appreciate the encouragement of my lovely daughter, lyric....isnt she a doll!
so i didnt really go anywhere---but i've been everywhere, man. (you are humming it now, arent you!)

Dear Mom,

This is your daughter,

I have hacked into your blogger account and there is no turning back now,

Fortunately, your password wasn't too difficult.

and, I could be wrong,

but I dont think so...


when I speak on behalf of your readership,

and state,

that we would love it if you shared witty, thoughtful, and usually cryptic commentaries with us.

Thank you,

Your favorite daughter,

Lyric



P.S. (bonus!) :

Lines from my diary, June 14, 1994:

"i love my mom she is sweet when i kiss her i fill her love as speshly when she hugs"