this is me now

4.10.2011

vanity, thy name is...........

MEREDITH ANN ENSIGN JEPPSON

okay---a few things you need to know about me---if you dont already.

i am very very vain---altho i hide it well by wearing unkempt,goofy hair and not always wearing makeup and schlupping (sp?) around in slippers and muu-muu's (all totally done to hide my natural vane-ness---yeah---right) (hmmm---have i blogged about my love of muu-muu's and how happy i am to finally be the age to wear them and not be totally guffawed (yes, I said it) at---AND----have you counted how deep into parentheses i am!?))))))

i love maxi dresses---thats what we called them in the late 1960's----they are the wonderful "dont have to wear hose or worry about keeping your knees together or bending over" dresses....AND they are IN right now! yay!

knowing those two points---you are now prepared to read the rest of this post.

i go to church today----ready to play with my sweet nursery kids----which means i wear LONG FLOWING skirts or MAXI dresses!
i'm feeling pretty good----i have a couple of dresses that ( at least, I think) make me look long and lean...or at least long.

then in walks our wonderful music leader---she comes in every week and sings with the kids---and she is the mommy of one of my sweet boys---today, in the interest of anonymity (sp?--really, merf---twice you have to sp?) we'll call her Barbie (ashley---dont take it personally---i'm giving you an alias to protect your identity----oops)---she is a pretty, blonde, talented and pleasant young mother and has two of the most beautiful little boys (well---other than MY little boys----but.....i digress......)))))----and did i mention she is 6 stinkin months pregnant!!!!!???? (she is due in July---so even with that ---her mom beats me out---mine are due in august and september----gawsh)

and i notice....we have the same dress (style) on....oh my stinkin gosh----she is 6 months pregnant---with her 3rd child---which means, we all know, that she looks like 8 months ( but you dont, ash---i mean Barbie---sorry---i'll work on that)))).....so i look down at what i thought was long and lean....and just see....wellllll---realizing that the dress doesnt necessarily fit well---the straps need to come up A LOT---and its dragging on the ground....Barbie's (see, Ashley---I can remember to not....oh,,,,, rats) doesnt drag---BUT SHE HAS A BEAUTIFUL BELLY holding hers up.


the end result is----she lets me take a picture of her---not knowing what i have planned until AFTER i take the picture---see what i mean when i say she is pleasant!?---and then tries very hard to convince me that i dont look 6 MONTHS PREGNANT and that her dress isnt really a maternity dress (does that argument work on ANYONE? )......and i'm sure it was very awkward for her---but she didnt show it....pleasant.

so.....i'm going to give the dress to lyric---i think its probably too long for leah----altho i am 5'6" now (thats a whole 'nuther blog---I'VE STARTED SHRINKING)))))----because, in my mind....it is a maternity dress....or, at the very least, belongs on a much younger, pleasanter---altho NOT BLONDER (so there, ashl---i mean Barbie---yeah---thats it)

this is not a pathetic plea for 'NO NO NO MERF---you look GREAT' (for a woman your age---you always forget to say that)---it just is what it is.....sigh.

6 comments:

Ashley said...

oh my goodness, I am laughing so hard right now! And having a crummy night at work-so thanks for making my night better=) But SERIOUSLY everyone should wear maxi dresses, but especially preggos because they are super comfy.

I didn't notice it in church today, but just now in the picture-you're right you do need to just shorten the straps. That way it won't drag on the floor and it won't look like your boobs are half way between your hips and your shoulders. (Did I just go too far giving you advice on your boobs? and saying boobs so many times in a blog comment? I'll stop now...)

But really, thanks for the flattering comments about me and for cheering up my night!

Merf said...

FOR EVERYONE READING THE COMMENT SECTION---WELCOME----AND THAT WAS ASHLE---I MEAN BARBIE---THAT COMMENTED FIRST! :)

i was going to use the word boob---but thought i might offend miss pleasant perky there---so, since i wont---then yes---the boobage is definitely looking like its heading south (who are we kidding---looking like---)

Princess Mommy said...

I love maxi dresses for the same reasons!

Ashley said...

When I saw your picture I immediately thought that you just needed to move the straps up a bit to help out the saggy ladies :)

I wish I had a few maxi dresses during this pregnancy. But by the time I caught on to their popularity it was too late to spend money on a dress I'd only be wearing a few more times. And now I can't wear them because I'll be nursing :(

The great thing about maxi dresses is that everyone can wear them. Give the dress another chance - pull up the straps and I think it will look a lot better!

Christie said...

I totally can't wear dresses like that because they just highlight the fact that there is not much space between my boobs and my belly button. Just sayin'

Sharon said...

I really identified with the fact that we dress so different depending on whether we are a nursery leader, in the Relief Society Presidency or a YW's leader.